Free Agent - EU
This is mostly a meme tier list denoting my personal experiences with enemies and teammates, ranking them based on the typical behavior their players exhibit.
It's likely to be triggering, specially since there's a chance you'll recognize yourself here. Again, this only applies to ranks up to Plat I, and I am basing this off of my week long climb from Silver II to Plat IV.
I should also note I haven't really played the game seriously before that from the times of the pre-seasons/open beta, (Remember back when your champions were given an individual rank in competitive? sip) so, although some stereotypical behavior hasn't changed, I can only truly speak for late Season 2.
ss
Barik and Inara players are the top champions in the list, usually accompanied by the most well intentioned players. They will generally just take a safe pick where they can do their own thing in their corner of the point, and just hope that the rest of their team isn't completely braindead can at least help them not get steamrolled into a 0-4 loss.
In behavior, they tend to be in a mood that avoids toxic behavior from lower ranked champions on the list, and you can always, although with varying levels of skill, count on them to pull their own weight.
This might be due to Barik and Inara not being an obvious meta to low elo players, as I have never really seen any of these two champions get picked for bans despite their above average win rate.
In short, these players are the ones I always wished I could see on my own team rather than the enemy team.
s+
Seris, Atlas, and Ash may not have very much in common as far as their behavior goes. They aren't very remarkable, but generally are on the alignment of neutral good.
Seris is the epitome of the mute withdrawn healer making sure the ass of their teammates doesn't get completely annihilated. Atlas is often banned, but through virtue of being a bit busted is never something you'd rather see on the enemy team than yours. Ash players meanwhile aren't exactly well meaning or exceptionally good, but they at least seem to somewhat know what they're doing and I have rarely if ever seen an Ash player not do their job of ramming headfirst into someone who would dare even look at the point in the wrong way.
s
Fernando and Grohk, Cassie and Torvald. Either a lesser version of the above players, or rare remnants of metas past.
Although cancerous behavior starts peeking its ugly head in the form of Grohks and Fernandos who despite having wanted to pick a tank or healer anyway deviate into playing more like flanks, complaining about it to them always seems to get them back on track and turn the game around.
Torvald players are as high IQ as the champion itself when they fully grasp the concept of yeeting people off the map with their ult, and they manage to do it more often than not. Meanwhile, Cassie players are a bit of an anomaly, but a welcome one nonetheless, as they rarely feed and can land a couple arrows into oncoming traffic in the form of a cheeky flank or battered tank.
s-
This tier is essentially the discount version of the above one, with now more common picks but similar good spirit of not wanting to fuck shit up just wanting a good time for their team.
There is really not much to say about it. People, for some reason, tend to think that Makoa is the digital version of a literal God whom you must either absolutely ban or have on your team, although the average displayed performance does not justify it.
Furia, Voodoo-Man Mal'Damba, and Jenos meanwhile are just standard healers, and a standard healer is always a good thing, and is unlikely to be a tumor in the body of your team, and for that, we thank them.
Sadly, at just 13 out of 43 champions, we come to the end of not worrying about who the hell it is that you're playing with.
a+
Truly average, and it is now that you also start noticing the Russian nicknames, voice chat, and occasional message. Although not bad in itself, it is that which marks the beginnings of trouble for any person wanting to climb out of the competitive version of a middle school.
A flanker too many (Maeve), a Pip that doesn't really heal, a Buck that sorta just aimlessly jumps around the map and either self-heals or dies shortly after, those are somewhat understandable.
Raum and Khan, as no doubt picks from players who just want to win and have heard praise of their champion of choice, are a really hit and miss occurrence, as they come from the heart of those who do not always know how to play, but sure hope and somewhat rightfully that they may not exactly need skill to get a victory with these champions.
a
Unremarkable (Ying), somewhat fringe (Io and Imani), or plainly just someone who thinks that because someone annihilated them with a champion means this champion must absolutely be busted (Lex, Moji, Strix)...
Those are often the worst case scenario you can get from having these players on your team, because although the above is true, it may be that you just get exactly the kind of player that has traumatized the enemy into banning their champion in their next competitive match-up.
a-
Sometimes, you get an absolute God of a Willo, Grover, Lian or Bomb King. And sometimes you just get an average player (Drogoz) all around or someone who still thinks that Evie is anywhere near as bullshit as she was in pre-seasons.
But sadly, that is only sometimes. Most of the time, you really only get a player who has just enough IQ not to go AFK or feed. At the very least, these can still be carried if their performance is sub-par, as they rarely ever fall far below average.
b
And so we arrive at the 13 most cancerous picks of the 43 available champions. By now you are no doubt used to seeing and hearing Slavic or Turkic non-sense in your government-subsidized "competitive player" experience, and it is true that it is now that you can proudly proclaim for your partners in demise to hear: "GG, this is lost" as well as witness a diverse range of hand-picked insults in various tongues.
We present to you in this tier:
The Deathmatch One Trick Pony: Dredge
The Green "I Wanted to Play Damage but Got Tank Instead: Ruckus
The Rocky "I Wanted to Play Damage but Got Tank Instead: Terminus
and who can forget about our carefully selected assortment of:
The Literal Definition of Teenage Angst and Edge: Androxus
The Annoying Yet Diverse Excuse for a Monkey: Talus
The Discount Version of Talus: Koga
The descriptions alone should be enough to convey exactly what is going on in here, but yet it does not mean an instant loss. Far from it. But what it does mean is the beginning of your inevitable descent into madness. The first circles of Elo Hell.
c
Somewhat sadly, the average skill level of your teammates dips even further here. And even more sad is that the champions and the associated behaviors are even less remarkable. There is not much to say, not that much to cringe at, and with it just comes the acceptance that your team does not have close to the damage output that it should have on paper.
Yes, more often than not, the game is lost. Yes, more often than not, you will hear exactly these players trashtalk the rest of your team, especially the healers and tanks who objectively did nothing wrong.
After all, Kinessa and Skye are the uncontested queens of being dead, and Sha Lin the king of planting his stupid ass in one place to chuck arrows of which most if not all will miss their target while a high velocity dog (usually Pip), which understands the concept of strafing, repeatedly blasts him in his static face.
Tyra and Vivian, you might say, don't really deserve their place in this tier as their players tend to do good damage. Right? Wrong. Consider the fact that both of these champions are essentially the bustier version of a Viktor in spirit while having even less longer range capabilities. They do not offer much to the team, do not take much understanding of the game to play, and are mechanically dull. And yet, sometimes, these players still manage to feed and complain about how no one is killing the flanks, or the enemy healer, or the enemy damage, even though it's supposed to be their job, and they sure as hell aren't doing it.
d
Viktor and Zhin players have a very special place in my heart. 99% of the time, they either feed, AFK, or result in your team composition having either no healer or no damage. Today alone I have managed to be in a game with these two champions either in my team or the enemy team, and they have, without fail, for 5 games or so in a row, managed to completely obliterate their team's chances at winning.
Although their shenanigans result in more easy wins than losses for me, I have still decided to pour out a sentimental poem in prose about them (here goes nothing):
YOU SAD STUPID FUCKING CRINGE MONKEY, OH MY GOD, DID I LEGIT JUST LOSE ANOTHER GAME, HOLY SHIT JUST UNINSTALL THE GAME, HI-REZ, PLEASE, DELETE THE ACCOUNTS OF ALL VIKTOR/ZHIN MAINS, FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, I AM GOING TO FUCKING KILL MYSELF FFFFUUUUUUUUUUU-
This was my Paladins tierlist, I hope you enjoyed. Please leave a like and subscribe for more, and also click the bell button, thanks!