I'm writing you this letter because I'm afraid we'll start fighting if I try to talk to you in person. Lately, it seems if we manage to resolve one problem peacefully, we're soon arguing about something else. I don't know when this bickering first crept into our relationship, but it's been getting worse over the last two or three months. I've decided I can't continue our almost daily spats, saying things I soon regret and hearing things that become deeply etched upon my mind and heart. That is why I feel we need to separate, at least for the time being. I realize, though, that our lives are too interconnected for me to disappear without letting you know that I'll be staying at Rachel's for the moment. If you need to contact me, the phone number is on the refrigerator. I think it would be better, though, if we could stay as incommunicado as possible for a while and make this separation an actual experiment in living without one another.

I honestly don't think that just one of us is to blame for all our problems, but together we combine to form a combustible mixture that blows up more and more frequently. The bad times are beginning to outnumber the good, and that's starting to affect my outlook on life even when we're apart. I go to work irritable after our testy exchange at breakfast and am soon snapping at my co-workers, who give each other warning looks when I come into the office now. I don't look forward to coming home anymore, either, and look around for extra work to do at my desk, even though you know I don't get paid for overtime there.

It's a shame that this is happening to us because when the pendulum swings the other way, no two people are happier than we are. The kind of love we've known is not found by everybody and is certainly too precious to throw away without fighting to hold on to it. In other words, we can't just end our relationship and throw away all that we've built up together over the past three years until we know for sure where we stand. That is why I think the only wise solution is to separate for a while and see if "absence makes the heart grow fonder" or if our relationship is actually worn out and we find ourselves with a mutual case of "out of sight, out of mind." I'm afraid that only time and space will determine our true feelings. It's painful for me to leave you, Buck, but I only have our best interests at heart.

I am confused and disheartened.